THE KILLING SONG

I am a karaoke fan, not a die-hard one, enough to be equipped with an average crooning skill to deliver whenever called upon. I’m quite reserved, perhaps I don’t trust my skills that much so I don’t show off with the karaoke mic at parties be it at my home or someone else’s house. I’m not one of those wannabes and glory hogs who tend to monopolize karaoke air time, not giving others a chance to join the fun. What more if such wannabes show off with a sub-par singing voices eh ? ugh 😦 Since home parties are generally attended by tame people, everyone takes the slip of etiquette in stride. A lady friend of mine who could no longer take the monopolizing habit of another lady friend of ours finally put the kibosh on the issue with a calculated joke at a recent party. She said ” hey – you guys better start singing now because if this girl touches the mic later on, she will be on a solo concert “. It was an innocuous ribbing, people laughed, but everyone got the gist including the girl. The good part was the errant girl took the message to heart that night and refrained from hogging the mic and bore everyone with her sub-par singing talent πŸ™‚

When it comes to karaoke bars where strangers converge to have a good time, you would expect people to behave and respect people they don’t know. But people drink therefore the potential for inebriation is high. Consequently, the risk of inducing a rowdy and rambunctious atmosphere is also high. Casual jeering can turn nasty and end in a brawl. Never did it occur in my mind that a song can be the culprit in creating a brawl, let alone fatal shootings ! Case in point – the song – Frank Sinatra’s MY WAY is barred from karaoke bars in the Philippines because it generates some weird aura of invincibility in people, letting loose that adrenalin that turns them into war freaks. Not sure how the authorities came up with such a bizzare theory that MY WAY and karaoke bars are a deadly mix . Other than the astounding coincidence of MY WAY being sang in fatal brawls there can be no other reason 😯 But heck, come to think of it, how could you possibly piss off anyone , let alone get shot, if you sang James Taylor’s YOU GOT A FRIEND or Ringo Starr’s YOU’RE SIXTEEN ? How about RAINBOW CONNECTION ? πŸ˜† If Frank Sinatra were alive today, he would be shocked at how his song can turn deadly, capable of mutating people into murderers. Perhaps it is the curse of the Mafiosi, shades of Sinatra’s alleged ties withe mob in his heydays πŸ˜‰ Β If you want to know the Top Ten Songs to Kill Someone – check this out.


WTF ? Part 2

Every creature in this world is equipped with some form of defense mechanism to protect itself from predators. If you’re a specie that possesses zilch/nada defense mechanism, then you’re easy picking for everyone and you exist primarily for their consumption. Very likely you’re in the bottom of the food chain. I’ve heard and read about grotesque defense mechanisms of many species in this planet of ours, but never thought that spilling one’s guts would be one of them. Yes, apparently the sea cucumber does so. When it perceives a threat, it will disgorge its internal organs to confuse its predator as if to say – ” is this what you’re after ? here it is ” πŸ™‚ The sea cucumber then turns into a deflated looking balloon devoid of its contents therefore not worth the taking. The predator would likely feast on the guts with relative ease while the sea cucumber floats away to safety. But here’s the rub. The ejection is just a sly ploy to distract the predator. Its internal organs will re-grow in a matter of time. WTF ? Freaking awesome isn’t it ? Other than the male spider who willfully offers a leg so it could escape from being devoured by a cannibalistic and much bigger female spider immediately after copulation , this would be the most unbelievable escape artistry ever devised by nature. This one is for real, no illusions and although a one trick pony, it cannot be duplicated by anyone πŸ˜‰

PINOY WTF QUOTES

“I want to thank my mother, my father and my parents “… Melanie Marquez

” ladies and gentlemen , may I present – Mr. Kuya Germs ” … Richard Gutierrez, presenting German Moreno at a TV show

Celia Rodriguez during an awards night: β€œAnd the winner goes to…”

Heart Evangelista, reading a letter request at Myx: ” Dear Heart, I’d like to request the song blah blah… Of course, we will grant your request. You know, everything is possible… with God”

Vina Morales, announcing the winners of ASAP’s Clash Dance : ” It’s a tie-breaker ”

Inez Veneracion: “I am a one woman man”

Joe Cantada: So Atoy, what are your prospects now. Toyota looks extremely confident in this coming semi-finals round…
Atoy Co’s reply : Well Joe, the ball is around

Eddie Mercado: “Of the three titles at stake, which would you want to win?
Finalist: “I want to win the Bb. Pilipinas Universe because it is an honor to represent the Philippines in the whole universe

Joe Quirino: “Sharon, are you familiar with the current problems we have
in the film industry?”
Sharon: “Sorry, Tito Joe, I’m afraid not.”
JQ: “What about you Myra, what can you say?”
Myra Manibog: “Naku Tito Joe, I’m afraid also”

“I am inviting all the televiewers to watch our movie “14 Going
Steady” on the twenty-twoth of November”…Nadia Montenegro

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32 Responses

  1. My Way is still so deadly. πŸ™‚ That was even featured on NY Times: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/07/world/asia/07karaoke.html

    Thanks for the laughs by sharing those quotes/dialogues. I’m not sure if you’re reading The Professional Heckler’s blog (http://professionalheckler.wordpress.com/). You might like it, too, because it’s intelligently hillarious. πŸ™‚

    • Crazy isn’t it ? I don’t know why Pinoys kill when they get drunk .

      Yep, tks for the tip. I like the blog too.

  2. maybe it is has got to do with the lyrics of the song.
    And now the end is near, and now I face the final curtain… haha

    I do not know the people but the quotes are hilarious πŸ™‚

    • maybe – who knows. Perhaps its got to do with braggadocio πŸ˜‰

      The people are all celebs that’s why the public pays attention 😯

  3. Rainbow Connection, isn’t this the song from the Muppet Show ? lol.

    That escape routine is pretty slick. I wonder how long the organs will grow again πŸ˜‰

    Funny quotes. Looks more of broken English to me.

    • Yes.. now that would be a pretty harmless song πŸ˜‰

      the question is – what happens to the cucumber when the organs are in the stage of regrowing ? Should it go on a forced comatose ??

      Yep, mostly broken English.

  4. i may have been the only pinoy left without a karaoke machine at home and the only one who hasn’t been to a karaoke bar. too shy to sing my heart out loud like that πŸ™‚

    funny quotes, where do you get them?

  5. What an amazing world πŸ™‚

  6. interesting subjects of discussion. I enjoyed reading this post.

  7. I guess we are all at the bottom of the food chain against wall streets predatory greed. Unless we are one of those banking fucks that banks on that pride of dominance.

    • I can’t refute that statement. The irony is, the same WALL ST. people who ripped the consumers of their retirement plans and lifetime savings were bailed out by the government !

      They say Bill Gates and Steve Jobs deserve their fortunes but not those banking CEOs who could make $50M a year easy and even more with their fat salaries and bonuses 😦

  8. i’m not even commenting on the videoket, lol. but i like the sea cucumber’s way. very in your face, if you can call it that way, haha! as for those nice quotations, well, i ain’t going there! πŸ™‚

    • It’s a coincidence that you blogged about videoke on a wake ! That’s really odd. If it does become a fad it will hit the OMG/cultural shock list for sure πŸ˜‰

  9. ay nako, buti na lang I rarely go out for karaoke… malakas magkaroon ako ng kaaway because of that…

    kahit ayaw ng dancing sa ken, mas gusto ko pa rin mag disco/clubbing every chance I can get… nakaka burn ng fats, healthy pa! πŸ™‚

    • Lol Jeff. Don’t tell me you’re a fan of My Way too ? πŸ™‚

      I agree. Dancing is one heck of an aerobic exercise. You gotta’ hit the floor a few times to make it a nice workout and shake the effect of booze too πŸ˜‰

  10. ang napa ka controversial na my waaayy!

    had fun with the one liners. :p

  11. Can’t sing so pass muna; but seen some who tried and they’re pretty bad, I mean real bad and they kept singing. I know so, some are wifey’s relatives and see them during gathering maybe five times a years which is torture for me.

    This is the best quote so far which I’ve heard lately:

    Lito Lapid (noypi senador): kung saan si Jinggoy doon di ako. This quote was in reference as to how would he vote for the impeachment hearing of the ombudswoman. Pag di ka ba naman masiraan ng bait with comments like that…dios mio!

    • torture ? lol.. that’s funny πŸ™‚

      And what can we expect from Lito Lapid ugh… these stooges in the senate are just vote getters for their political parties – no more no less.. Now that’s real embarrasing statement from a full fleged senator duh 😦

  12. Truth be told, I really hate “My Way.” (To think that I don’t use the term “hate” so much.) I don’t know why a lot of men like to sing it, especially the drunk men. πŸ™‚

    Got to watch the Frank Sinatra bio film on BBC way back. His was a sad story alright. And it was a surprise to know he had Mafia links.

    Hi, BW. Hope all is well. Happy Easter in advance!

    • never my favorite song and I rarely sing it to be honest. It’s so old fashioned πŸ™‚

      Sinatra was a character. I heard didn’t like shaking hands with people for fear of being contaminated with germs πŸ˜‰

      All is well my friend. Hope you’re well too. Happy Easter to you too.

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