Valentine’s Day Thoughts

I came across this ad in one of those free daily papers the other day :

“Plan to be spontaneous this Valentine’s Day. Come and get a payday advance and treat your loved one to something truly special “

Now that’s ripping your pocket off with some usurious interest rates – isn’t it ? 😯 What do these folks charge you, 20 % of the amount or even more ? It is good news that in 2009 this province declared Feb 15 as Family Day, an official holiday. Those who get paid on the 15th of Feb will get their salaries earlier, hopefully early enough to celebrate Valentine’s with a bang 🙂 This new holiday declaration extends Valentine’s into a family celebration more so if it falls on a long weekend. That’s swell. For those without children, Valentine’s will be a 2 day affair 😉 Valentine’s is one day when lovers reflect on their relationship and impress one another with cool gifts. Others simply go with the flow and celebrate the day with a nice dinner or a date to a movie, play or a concert. Incidentally, we had our pre-Valentine celebration to a Mariah Carey concert last Tuesday. Dang, Mariah showed up almost 2 hours late – I’ll blog about this later 😦 No elaborate plans for Valentine’s this time except for a dinner with the wifey and the daughter and a short trip up north to enjoy the long weekend. We’d be cruising the malls for a bit too so I won’t be surprised if we pick up something dandy for each of us 😎

Here’s some cool Valentine’s jokes from my jokes folder 🙂

 

THE PICK UP LINE

My boyfriend and I met online and we’d been dating for over a year. I introduced Hans to my uncle, who was fascinated by the fact that we met over the Internet. He asked Hans what kind of line he had used to pick me up. Ever the geek, Hans naively replied, “I just used a regular 56K modem.” 😆

 

THE WIFE’S REVENGE

There once was an old couple who had been married for thirty years. Every morning the old boy would wake up and give off an enormous fart, much to his long suffering wife’s annoyance. “You’ll fart your guts out one of these days,” she always complained. After a particularly bad week the wife decided to have her revenge and got up early, placing some turkey giblets in the bed next to the old boy’s arse. While making breakfast downstairs she heard his usual morning fart reverberate through the floorboards followed by a scream. Twenty minutes later a rather shaken man came downstairs. “You was right all along Missus,” the old man says, “I finally did fart my guts out, but by the grace of God, and these two fingers, I managed to push ’em back in!” :mrgreen:

COMPLIMENT

A woman standing nude in front of a mirror says to her husband: ‘I look horrible, I feel fat and ugly, pay me a compliment.’ He replies, ‘Your eyesight is perfect.’ 🙂
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OLDER BUT NOT WISER

Last week I ordered a wooden filing cabinet with 4 drawers. I wanted a sturdier cabinet for my files that had been cramming into a couple of fully packed 2 drawer low-end steel cabinets. I was glad that the shop offered free delivery. It would save me the hassle to hauling up the cabinet upstairs, to my home office. One weekday night the delivery came and guess what – the darn cabinet was in a big box, still be be assembled. The delivery man was instructed to deliver the box at my doorstep period, no more no less 😦 I was disgusted but had no choice but to assemble the cabinet piece by piece at the room where it was supposed to go. The instructions weren’t bad and all the materials needed – screws, bolts, glue, allen wrench – were inside the box. No hammerring and nailing required, just a standard screwdriver to bolt everything up . I did the assembly one Saturday afternoon and I was finally wrapping up, inserting the last drawer into the bottom part cabinet, it wouldn’t fit ! I found out that I inadvertendly reversed a piece of wood at the very bottom. I needed to take out all the drawers, detach one of the sides of the cabinet so I can get access to the piece that was wrongly positioned. I did fix it and I was lucky the glue hasn’t totally dried up on the wooden joints. Man, I cursed myself for messing up such a simple step. I swear if I had a chisel I could have just cut the errant piece and couldn’t care less how the cabinet looked 😯 It was a real drag and when it was over asked myself – “self, how could you possibly bungle such simple thing you stupid SOB ” ? 😡

I hate it when I mess up with simple things but no matter how embarrassing, I would take it anytime over a major screw up. Nothing in life is risk free and I’m not about to turn myself into a recluse, holed up in a little cave so I can eliminate any danger to my existence. Like is about taking risks ,of being brave enough to trust your abilities, smart to recognize and mitigate risks when you perceive them. Last week I saw a 20 year old Asian dude accompanied by both his parents to the walk in clinic for consultation with his doc for flu symptoms. Common’ now – that’s frigging babysitting an adult 😡 When will he learn ? No pain no gain they say and in my opinion, what we are today is the product of how we viewed and handled risk and learned from the mistakes we committed.

YOU’LL GET OLDER BUT NOT NECESSARILY WISER

Here’s an excerpt from the book Rules of Life. We all seem to think that we become wiser as we grow older. Experienced perhaps but that does not exempt us from goofing up once in a while.Rule No. 2 – You’ll Get Older But Not Necessarily Wiser dispels the notion that getting older means getting wiser. I totally agree with the author when he says that ” wisdom isn’t about not making mistakes but about learning to escape afterwards with our dignity and sanity intact”. It is a nice way of describing survival – getting badly beaten but somehow finishing the 12 rounds 😉 That also means not putting a bullet in our head because we screwed up 😯 As one saying goes – mistakes are totally useless if we learn nothing from them. True, safety first would reduce the probability of making mistakes but it will also reduce our chances of achieving greatness. Ironically, life is all about the business of taking risk to get rewarded. Somewhere along the way, we are bound to make mistakes to gain experience. Now to complete the irony, they also say experience is a hard teacher because it gives the test first, the lesson afterward 😉

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Thoughts for Year 2010

The typical dilemma for those of us in the 9 to 5 workplace is the lack of recognition or let me put it in another way, our “perception” of our boss(es)’ lack of recognition of our effort and dedication. Whatever the reasons are – legit unfairness or remonstrations of our bloated egos, there is always a case to make when it comes to not getting the breaks we expect. This reminds me of the movie Picture Perfect, where an advertising analyst portrayed by Jennifer Aniston went ballistic when she did not get the credit for the savvy, highly successful ad she conceptualized for a major client. The credit went to the other senior members of the team and not her, the brainchild of the ad. The senior marketing executive of the firm told her that the reason why he did not give her a promotion was he wasn’t sure he could keep her because she was young, single and unattached, with no mortgage and car loan liabilities and she could f-off anytime to the competition ! The short end to the story was she concocted a plan – paid someone to pretend she was engaged… well just watch the movie 🙂 Just an aside – Jennifer Aniston might not look like a goddess like Marilyn Monroe or Elizabeth Taylor but man, the way she walks- the swan-like graceful trot – kills 😉 Her walk is as sensual as a nude pose, to me that is. 🙂

Okay, the movie Picture Perfect I watched many moons ago might be a dumb example 😉 ( and I thought the movie, if not for the delightful Jennifer Aniston was wishy-washy to say the least ) but it illustrated how people can go crazy when it comes dealing with frustrations in the pursuit of their ambitions.
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Willie Revillame and ABS-CBN – A Misunderstanding Of Respect ?

The recent brouhaha between Wowowe host Willie Revillame and ABS-CN has shifted into an all out war between Revillame and the public, the latter calling for Revillame’s ouster as host of the show, in view of his allegedly rude comments in rebuke of ABS-CBN’s tasteless decision of airing Cory Aquino’s funeral cortege in the background of his loud and boisterous game show. People branded Revillame’s tirade as utterly boorish or complete “kabastusan” and disrespect of the dead president. But, was it really ?

I am thinking, what could be more “kabastusan” than showing a funeral cortege as a PIP ( Picture in Picture) in a noontime game show, full of gyrating dancers and contestants jumping and up and down, audience cheering and clapping ? What was ABS-CBN’s motivation to do this ? I can only think of one reason ; TV rating – hitting two birds with one stone, so that viewers need not switch channels. In short, you’re “entertained” by both events by a single channel. I am reminded of a light hearted statement made by the late movie reporter Babette Villaruel when asked about the funeral of his deceased father “ Okay naman ho. Successful naman yung burol niya”. Clearly, he was adding a showbiz twist to the event, in levity of course.

In my book, ABS-CBN’s decision to air Cory’s cortege as background to a game show was utterly disrespectful. It unequivocally treated the funeral of a deceased leader in the category of “showbiz” material. This equally reveals how lowly ABS-CBN considers its Wowowie viewers for subjecting them to such adacious display of callous and reckless commercialism. Revilliame’s decision to cry foul, protest and correct the situation was done in a manner befitting the gravity of the infraction – swift, blunt, straightforward and resolute and rightfully so. Revilliame isn’t exactly an emcee with a smarmy personality. He is a pretty ordinary looking guy, a bit rough on the edges, oftentimes missing on his v’s and f’s but nonetheless very capable of handling the show. Now his career is on the line for standing up to his employer’s “kabastusan” because the public at large failed to perceive the reason behind his blunt and no holds barred protestation.

Here’s a comment I made at an online forum thread discussing this imbroglio :

I don’t know why you folks want to kill the guy who wanted to defend Cory from the kabastusan of ABS-CBN, of SHOWING A FUNERAL IN A GAME SHOW.

This is the big deal – SHOWING A FUNERAL IN A GAME SHOW – the most disrespectful act of an expolitative, greedy, bloodsucking station like ABS-CBN who has no respect for dead people because they didn’t want people to change channels. ABS-CBN was the culprit here believe it or not.

Willie stood up for what he believed and those IDIOTS who say why not wait for a commercial better understand that if a FOUL is committed, you don’t wait for a time out to address it.

There was no reason for Revillame to risk his career but to correct a WRONG he did it his way in a blunt, no holds barred, straightforward, brutally frank manner. If this happened in FOX, ABC, CBS, NBC – showing Michael Jackson or Ronald Reagan’s funeral in the Price is Right, Jeopardy or Deal or No Deal game shows- the director of the show will be FIRED ON THE SPOT. You guys don’t have a clue of what respect means.

ABS-CBN has some explaining to do. They seem to be content on seeing their staff absorb the heat and getting lynched for their injudiciousness.

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Finders Keepers Losers Weepers.. No More ?

finderskeepers-ryanbubnisFor those who think that the hope of reuniting with a lost precious item depends solely on the honesty of the finder, despair not. “Finders keepers losers weepers” remains a thing of the past, hopefully only to be heard from the scratchy 45 rpm records of Elvis Presley and Cliff Richard. The homo sapien appears to be on track with its journey to enlightenment and had nixed the proverbial notion of the finders keepers rule as medieval, as evidenced by the latest legal rulings in the western world. Great ! Case in point, in England, a couple who cashed in a L30,000 winning lottery ticket they found on a shop floor were charged with fraud and ordered to pay back the rightful owner of the lottery ticket, interest included. Ouch. This was contingent of course on the rightful owner giving evidence and convincing the courts that she bought the ticket. The new rule simply says – if you found something, it is not automatically yours. You must exert effort in finding the owner. If no one shows up to claim after a period of time set by the law, only then will you be entitled to keep it” If you keep it and someone finds out, you’re as good as a thief. Strangely logical?

images_lotteryHere’s an even stranger one which happened in the U.S. A man handed his $2 lottery ticket to a store attendant for him to check if it won anything. The machine came up with a printout that confirmed the ticket was the 1st prize, $65M jackpot winner. The attendant gave the validation receipt to the man and advised him to proceed to the lottery office to claim his prize but the dunce “lost” his winning ticket. How could he muff the darn thing ? If he didn’t have a wallet, how about storing the damn ticket between his butt cheeks for safety huh? Who cares if it stinks, it’s still a friggin’ ticket 😡  A box of surgical gloves doesn’t cost that much 🙂 He showed the validation receipt as evidence of his win, but the lottery office required a 365 day waiting period for someone to come forward with the winning ticket because “ by law, whoever turned in the actual ticket would be entitled to collect “ Ouch. Now, this becomes strangely complicated ! Luckily no one showed up with the ticket within the and the man was able to cash in the $21M prize ( after taxes). What if someone found the ticket and showed up at the lottery office? Methinks this is where smart lawyers come in and play their sophisticated tug of war game 😉 I would hazard a guess that the ticket finder will get half, of which his lawyer may likely get third of his booty . The ticket loser will get the other half obviously and his good lawyer will take his well deserved cut as well. In short, everybody wins 😎 but the jackass ticket loser would curse himself forever for being a supreme buffoon, losing more than half of his winnings to people who didn’t derserve it 😯 Well, he can also pat himself in the back for being an instant benefactor, depending on his mood 😆

Finders keepers, losers weepers no more – what do you think ? Does it make sense? Will it work where you live ? 😉


MY 2 CENTS ON CORY’S SAINTHOOD

images_saintThe death of former president Cory Aquino shocked the world. Cory’s legacy as a mother and housewife who led her country’s revolution from the hands of a tyrant dictator after her illustrious husband had fallen in battle is certainly heroic.  She wasn’t by any means perfect but most of us saw her try her darnest best to mend a country’s broken spirit. I have seen hundreds of blogs honoring her, commented on a lot of them and felt like I had no need to blog about it because most of what I wanted to say had been said. I thought the media coverage in Pinas was a bit too much but considering her popularity, that was to be expected.  The one thing that disappointed me was the proposal of some of her die hard supporters to canonize her as saint. I thought this was really going overboard, into outer space, if I were to allegorize how preposterous the proposal is.

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